It would have more of an impact.  I don't know what you had been "
in" to but, back in 78 when we did this, it was part of a nationwide experiment to curb the use of serious drugs---mainly heroin, acid, pcp, angel dust, etc........I don't remember everything that happened that afternoon, but I do remember the one guy who was sitting at my group almost bursting out into tears when one of my friends showed him the plastic part of a hypodermic needle.  I remember he kept saying "Because of that thing....my friends killed themselves....Because of that thing, I robbed..and so on.

Then again I remember seeing movies about drug usage that would not even fly today because they were so graphic......anyway....good luck!

The big thing is that YOU are in control---they want YOUR experience and voice, and to make it work, you need to be you...Hell, if you have to make a speech--walk into the crowd and talk to people.  Dont' make it a speech--have points to talk about..

You know instead of giving a speech you might want to have a small group session, or just talk to people.  Back in the 1970's when I was in grade school (k-8th) we had some teens/young adults come in and talk to us in small sessions about drugs---there were 32 kids in class and 4 people came they were between 17 and 21, and we broke into 4 groups of 8....Don't sweat it..you've already done the hard part!

OAU

P.S. if you want to, would you be willing to take my survey? I didn't initially post with the intent of asking you, but I'd like your opinion.

Oh my goodness!  Fate or something like that.  lol Maybe it is just meant for Thursday.  You should have someone record it and upload it. 

I'm so proud of you!  Knock em dead, you'll do great, just be you.

Is anyone video taping it?

Are you excited about the possibility of tying your own shoes?  I know I sure was!

Random acts of flowers....that sounds like a sweet charity.  I was just telling Fred that next year, Ryan is giving away all his unused toys at the local hospital.  I don't think he would understand this year, he is only 19 months.  I really do not want him to be spoiled, I want him to appreciate what he has.  I think it has much more meaning to have him go in there and give the kids his stuff than to just box it up and donate it. 

Is there anything you stuill need babywise?  I am a broke bitch but I still have a lot of Ryan's old stuff not getting any use. 

You named your hamster after your friend?

Awesome, Sky!  What a nice thing to do.  I love the Angel Tree at Walmart.  Here they even have one for the elderly at the local nursing home.  Slipper socks all around

I always pick girls off the tree  because I feel left out, not having a a little girl to buy for.  Girl stuff is so much more fun than boys, so much more stuff too. 

i hope you get well soon.

awe congrats to your mom. i didn't realize she was pregnant with twins too, that's kind of neat your babies will be really close in age. reminds me of father of the bride part 2:)

good luck with your upcoming hospitalization and on coming mother hood. you'll do wonderfully, no need to stress.

I like the name Isabella.  I like Giabella, too.  And Lulabella, lol.

Yeah, it does hurt.  I'm just glad I did it now instead of an hour beofre we leave.  At least now, it can heal a little before I get some ;) 

Go get some sleep!

that's great. it'll be really special for them since it's made by family. my mom told me when i finally get pregnant i'll have everything i need,lol. we're 33months into trying to conceive :( lately i'm letting go of the idea, who knows maybe that will work.

<3 Juli

i live near nashville. i went to school in sweetwater[45min away from knoxville]. we had a blast at the ut game. we had to be for the other team though because his cousin plays for them.

i love the shirts you got for the babies. i'm super excited for you. most of the time twins come a month early, they have to have a bit of help breathing normally but they grow just fine, and end up just as healthy. i wouldn't worry to much, the dr know what there doing.

good luck hun-Juli

GO OBAMMA

I didn't want kids either until I actually had my son. And even after having him, it took several weeks for me to get used to him. It took a while for me to actually say I loved him. I may have wanted kids eventually..I just didn't feel maternal..never have. I do now. I have really changed.

Just be good to those babies. I know you wouldn't mistreat them. But all these guys saying they will be there for you and be the dad..its a load of shit. The only dad they have is the one who has their DNA. And he is gone. You may fall in love some day and remarry...but don't let your babies call some guy dad, or several guys dad. Guys come and go. They don't want the responsibility of being a parent. I wouldn't of even asked that kid if he really wanted to be a father at 18..I would've said "I don't think so." Just please don't even consider it. These are your babies and no one else's. They may have a father figure some day...but it needs to be some one you are serious with mentally.

Sorry, I am just ranting. I know you aren't stupid. I have just been reading your diary and there are a few guys who have claimed they will take responsibility..its just not that easy. And don't let them unless YOU want them around. Every one needs help, but it takes a lot to call some one "dad."

I like the names.  I think you should give them your last name.  I am glad you are going to the doctor, some chicks think they don't need prenatal care.  My friend's sis went to the doctor twice, the entire pregnancy.  When she delivered they thought it was strange that she didn't have a doctor so they suspected she was on drugs and was avoiding the doc becuase of that.  So they tested the baby, sure enough...state took her kid for like 3 months until she cleaned up. 

Like you said, your CURRENT situation, it will change.  You'll be a great mother, it just happens, no one is ready. 

You want comments from Mark (aka--Lenahan) WAKE UP !! can understand your hormones thinking this person can actually give advice, in reality he thrives on putting down woman, talks about a life that does not exist for him and actually has spent time in a psychiatry ward, in which he will tell you that is his field but in reality he was a patient.

But who am I to pry...take advice from that egotistic, overweight, bald headed, rotted teeth, porno watcher, lonely thing that I guess he is suppose to be a man.  And see how far you get in life.

Lenahan can never take the truth...give it to him and he will block you from his comments. He will dedicate a whole page to you, in which will make you very popular (thank you, slime ball) but if you can not hack the wrath of his play world fantasy...back out now and have your baby without involving cyber communication.  Get yourself a real man that you can turn to in life.

Toodles

Do you really want him out of your life? Follow this golden rule:

Whatever he does, whatever he says, don't you ever have s..x with him. Make that crystal clear and I guarantee you he will be out of your life for good.

If he is still around is because you are part of his "bullpen".

Time will prove me right.

Hugs,

Mark.

happiee birfdaii den!!

best wishes

~Shannon (:

Hey there! Thanks for the comment! I love my kitty!

lol. morans..

love.venus

Oooo...Tattoo school, I would love to go to one of those. how much do they usually cost?

Best of Wishes,

LibraVamp

Congratulations!!

   This is absolutly wonderful and I hope you guys live happily ever after.

Best of Wishes,

LibraVamp

oh my goodness
that is so crazy
i havnt heard about ur sis in a while..im glad that she's doin ok tho
but i hope that she keeps doin ok with allt he babies inside of her
i hope that the babies do ok too
and i hope that your doin alright

   Heart Hugs! I'm glad to hear about Sam..Said a prayer for JOjo!

 Hope that you enjoy your church visit!

 Love, Hugs and Prayers,

        Jewel

Your life is like non stop! LOL... I never know what to expect from day-to-day reading your diary!

Have fun!

I had my nose done but had to take it out after 3 mounths becuase it hurt really bad

She is going to have to quit smoking pot. They will test her for it when the baby is delivered. And if she has pot in her system they will probably call social services. Smoking pot one time is ok...but don't do any thing else. No heroine or any thing. Gotta think about that baby inside of you. When that baby comes you are really going to have to stop doing drugs for good and stay away from drugs...no drugs in the house.

Heart Hugs! Thank YOU sooo much for your support in my recovery!  I think that sometimes feeling guilty is a good thing because it leads us to examine our choices and to get back on the right path.

    I think it's okay if we go through periods of sadness and regret...It calls us to do things differently and to choose a higher path!

    YAY for JoJo going into rehab...He will need your support once he gets out! 

   Praying that your day is FILLED with BLESSINGS!

   Love, Hugs and Prayers,

          Jewel

ahhh  I love Frost.  If he seriously wants to stay and wants help...rehab?  When are you due again?  Maybe he could be clean and sober by then...?

I noticed that mdd left question marks after every entence on my last entry..how strange.

Well, you would do anything for him... what will he do for you? Will he be able to quit doing heroin, or meth... I don't remember which one you said he was into.... for your relationship and the babies. Kids without a father grow up to be messed up, but kids with a drug addicted father are even more messed up. Think about it. Because it's not just about you anymore, it's about your kids. What will they see? What will they have to live thorough?

I'm sure you've already thought about these things, because you seem like you have a good head on your shoulders. But sometimes love can blind us in a way that will put us on the wrong path. And I know it's like the pot calling the tea kettle black here, but there are people out here that care about you and just want what's best for you and your babies.

Much Love,
K

How the fuck do you rob two pregnant chicks and a diabetic?  I mean....really???  I hope he gets his, and I hope ya'll get your shit back. 

It's strange heroin keeps finding its way into your life despite all you've done to rid yourself of it.  Maybe you need to move here...people here can't get real heroin so they shoot liquid morphine and call it heroin.  LoL Meth rules this area, there isn't room for much else. 

[thatpotsmokinghippy]

Synesthesia huh?  Around here we just call it acid, lol.  I'm only joking (not making fun of you, please don't think that), that's actually pretty cool.  I can't imagine what that would be like.  Good job resisting temptation for the sake of your babies.  It's sooo hard sometimes, I know.  Hope your new living situation works out well.

Jenn

Maybe me and you should cut ties, I do not want to end up with twins! lol

I didn't get stretch marks until 5 days before I had Ryan.  Thats what I get for bragging I guess. 

[thatpotsmokinghippy]

I love 90's rock.  Kurt was my main man.  Sublime is a huge favorite of mine...blind melon, violent fems...

I think you should email him back and tell him that you are focusing on school and he needs to take this time to sober his ass up.  Just live these next few weeks at school, who knows where you will headed  when you finish.  I think the greatest thing you can give a person is the power to change.  Unfortunatly, its a gift most people aren't interested in.  I don't knoe JoJo, maybe he is sincere but you be dragged down in the process.  He needs to get himself together before he is any good to or for you. 

YAY YAY YAY for being in school! I'm soooo very proud of you and hope that you are proud of yourself!

   Love, Hugs and Prayers,

          Jewel

I hope he's gone by the time you get home.  You don't need him, you and your twins will be much much better without those coward boys in your life.  Throw yourself into tattoo school, let it consume you.  Remember all the reasons that you have not to use or be with someone who uses.  Maybe once he is states away, it will easier.  Don't take his calls, nothing. 

lol...

FuNnY

PS i added you...hope u dont mind...lol

haha! i love these things. to dang funny. kid!

jai-jai

hahaha you are fun.

By the way, about your entry, take a look at this guy's arms. If you see small red marks you can kiss this guy goodbye. Trust me, you don't want to carry someone else's baggage.